A sign of the times?

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tantalizingblooms2005

tantalizingblooms2005

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Sep 7, 2006
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www.tantalizingblooms.com
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Another florist friend of mine from Michigan called to tell me a story of what he encountered recently and I wanted to pass this on to all of you.
My friend receives an order for a casket spray for the following morning going to a VFW Hall. He pulls up to VFW as the herse is pulling up. Gets out of his van and waits for the funeral directors to take the casket into the hall. When they open the back door, the body is not in a casket. It is just on a gurney, no casket at all. The funeral directors are standing there; waiting. A van pulls up and it is someone from the deceased family. They proceed to take a casket out of the back of the van and the funeral directors follow; as does my friend with the casket spray.
When they get into the VFW hall, the funeral directors put the body down. There are many family members present and some of them go into hysterics crying and whatnot. The family members with the casket proceed to the body and have to now move it from the gurney to the casket. Can you even picutre this??? People are crying and carrying on, and my poor friend is just watching this in disbelief. To me it sounds like something you would see in some black comedy and I really thought he was messing with me, but no, this really happened.
Is this something we can expect to see more of in this economy? I sure hope not.
 
Sounds like the family bought their own casket at a discount company. The funeral directors did their part, they delivered the body of the deceased. Not their job to put in the casket.

It really isn't anything new, will we see more of it? Maybe, but maybe not. Many family members couldn't handle handling the deceased.
 
wait a minute...so you're saying the FH did not put the body into the casket until it was at the VFW hall...right? Why would they do that?? I don't get it. This person was a veteran...I mean even if they weren't it's not right...but if they were it's completely disrespectful to him for serving his country to be treated in death that way.
 
It isn't just in times like these, Costco has been selling caskets for some time. For a while now in our area people can purchase their own casket and take it to the funeral home and the funeral home must use it.
 
Ok just posted and saw the costco post...why wasn't the casket delivered to the FH?? Would the FH not accept it??
 
FD's must not handle Costco Caskets. I've not seen this and I hope I don't either. What I have seen that really upsets me is the florists have all their flowers/plants at the church, family & friends are gathering and there is no sign of the FD or the body. DRIVES me crazy. It seems that families are gathering earlier all the time. WHY can't the FD have the body there so the flowers don't have to be placed and replaced.
 
I am saying the funeral director had nothing to do with the body after setting it down in the hall. Personally, I can't blame them for that. If the family wanted to get the casket at costco, it really is not the funeral directors issue at that point. If they were to "help out" that is just saying go ahead and cut us out, we will still help."
It is like a bride coming to you and saying, "I am buying my flowers from Costco, will you make my bouquets." I can not fault that funeral directors for that.
 
I'm sorry I don't agree. Handling flowers for a bride who bought them elsewhere is something entirely different to me....a dead person shouldbe shown the utmost respect no matter where their darn casket was purchased. God forbid that happens to my family members who desire to be buried in a "poor man's" casket-old pine board-in their final rest. I'm not going to accept that it's business reasoning...I understand the FH is being paid for their services in dealing with the dead and the grieving not to be choosy about where the casket came from. That's the family's right...he/she still needs to show some respect and remember the human factor. tsk..tsk..
 
I understand what you're saying Aileen, consider this, from the poster's information I see no disrespect to the deceased, nor his family. Had the family made other choices they would not have been in the position of caring for their family member.
 
I still don't see the need though to have done it like that in front of the family. I mean...most VFW's have a back entrance and they still could have done the transfer tactfully and respectfully there beofre bringing him out to the family. Regardless of the seperate delivery of the casket and the body.

Come to think of it I am a bit disgusted.
 
Perhaps it is what the family wanted, rather than the funeral director. Personally I would not want my family member hauled in through the back door, it would have seemed as if I felt they were unworthy of the respect of coming through the front door.

Without knowing the entire story on both sides it isn't for us to judge.
 
Yes, coming through the front door in a casket already...done respectfully but not seperate and then transferred inside for all to see. That's the part I am having hard time with. If it's because the family bought the casket at Costco and not from the FH then it's a real shame.

You are right in a sense...what if the delivery of the casket was late..something went wrong then maybe that is why the delivery of the body and casket happened like this...I'm still not accepting of the way the body was handled. I would hate to know if the family was put in a spot over this issue of the casket not being the FH's.
 
well, Aileen,

Welcome to the crazy world of florists. We don't know the whole story, and there are a plethora of reasons why this was done the way it was. Who Knows.

The thing that bothered me the most about this thread was the "scene out of a black comedy" remark. That seemed a bit disrespectful if you ask me.
 
Shannon, I am thinking they meant to say dark comedy...you know like film noir, etc? That's what I took it as.
 
aileen_c said:
Shannon, I am thinking they meant to say dark comedy...you know like film noir, etc? That's what I took it as.
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Thank you for the clarification. I truly do appreciate that, kinda freaked me out.
Now it makes MUCH better sense!!

hope I didn't offend anyone.

You are a doll Aileen!
 
This is truly amazing to me. Black comedy is right - Heave-Ho!

Anybody ever see Weekend At Bernie's?

As far as being respectful... Disrespectful children have been growing up for years now. We will always be a product of our own doing.

This would be like a florist showing up at the same time as FedEx and arranging the ProFlowers for the recipient.
 
tantalizingblooms2005 said:
I am saying the funeral director had nothing to do with the body after setting it down in the hall. Personally, I can't blame them for that. If the family wanted to get the casket at costco, it really is not the funeral directors issue at that point. If they were to "help out" that is just saying go ahead and cut us out, we will still help."
It is like a bride coming to you and saying, "I am buying my flowers from Costco, will you make my bouquets." I can not fault that funeral directors for that.
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The problem is the Costco casket was necessary because the FD's charge such extortionate prices. Deliver casket to FD's, FD puts deceased in casket, 3 minutes work for them. Plus the FD has the option of providing a budget range of coffins. I wouldn't want to see ANY body handled this way, let alone a loved one - I too would be in hysterics.

Plus, yes, we don't know the whole story.
 
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